An Intransigent Feminist Twit (nimbrethil) wrote in spiralpauper,
An Intransigent Feminist Twit

First post

Um. Hi.

I've been fighting depression for over a year now, which my therapists think is attributed to untreated ADD. I'm 30 years old and last summer, after having moved from Tennessee to Montana, my life started falling apart until it culminated in a suicide attempt. I lost my job, had to move, and was going to doctors regularly while 'fixing' my life situation so that the most I had to deal with was school work.

Since then, I have failed most of my classes and am now facing eviction from the dorm where I've been living. I'm being allowed to stay only so long as I continue treatment--I'm going to a therapist, psychiatrist, and a case worker three times a week right now, and I'm on four prescriptions), and I'm having to meet with the dean periodically to explain how things are going, in order to stay in her good graces while I actively look for other housing.

I'm not at all happy about it, but right now, it looks like college is out for the foreseeable future while I try to put myself back together, and I'm not working right now either, because I, and my support group, are concerned that trying to work right now would be too much for my emotional state. (I can barely get out of bed some days and have periodic anxiety attacks).

My only income is a gift payment from my parents of $300 per month. Right now I'm trying to get into HUD housing, and I'm looking at an apartment unit which would cost me $98/month, all said. I was prepare to move in on the 1st, but my credit check came back with someting wrong, that absolutely has nothing to do with me. (It shows I owe over $6,000 to someone for monthly payments of $211, which I'm supposedly five months behind on, even though I don't own a credit card and haven't made ANY large purchases in over a year, much less anything over $1000). Everything else is rather tied up right now while I work on getting this straightened out, so I'm in a bind until further notice (have applied for my credit report to try and get this cleared up). What I have to worry about in the meantime is that the apartment unit will still have a place for me when I do.

Otherwise, I'm currently in the process of working with an independent living agent to apply for SSI/SSDI. I made the call and got the ball rolling so that my name is in the system, and now I'm waiting for my agent to set up a meeting so that we can continue the application. I know that applicants are typically denied on the first try (at least here in Montana) as a means of weeding out people, but I'm terrified that my disability won't be recognized as valid, because it's not as visible as a physical handicap, or even as visible as a more debilitating disorder such as PTSD.

I'm a little scared, frankly.
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